


asphyxia

by DreamerFae



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Black Reaper Kaneki, Comedy, F/M, One Shot, Romance, kaneki is an artist and touka is a store owner, re Touka, two parts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-21 17:46:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14919989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreamerFae/pseuds/DreamerFae
Summary: Kaneki Ken has been stuck in the past and it's only when he meets Touka that time starts ticking again for him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> asphyxia - a condition arising when the body is deprived of oxygen, causing unconsciousness or death; suffocation.

"Asuka, I'm home! I bought some of your favorite donuts!" Kaneki called as he shrugged off his coat and shoes before making his way into the living room. Hearing no response from his girlfriend—whom he's been dating for a year, he walked towards his bedroom and jumped at the sound of someone moaning. His hand reached for the doorknob and he opened the door to reveal Asuka, in only her underwear, embraced by a man he didn't know and had his lips on her neck. On his bed. It turned out that the person moaning was Asuka and Kaneki's grey eyes widened when they met hers.

"Oh. You're home. Sorry you had to see that," Asuka nonchalantly said as she grabbed her shirt to put it on whilst the male hastily threw his shirt and pants on and avoided all eye contact with Kaneki. "I've been wanting to break up with you since a few months ago but couldn't find the right timing to do it. Now's the perfect time. Thank you for the relationship, Kaneki. It was fun while it lasted. I'll be leaving now."

—

Kaneki's eyes shot open and he felt cold sweat drip down his temple. He stared up at the white ceiling then turned to the side to face the wall before realizing that it was a nightmare. A horrible, horrible nightmare of something that actually did happen, 5 years ago when he just graduated from university and was just starting off as an artist. He forced himself out of bed, changed his sweaty clothes into a new set before heading to the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee and realizing that he didn't have any more left.

Tch.

The black haired male returned to his room, threw on a pair of outside clothes and headed out. Jamming his hands into his pockets, he briskly walked towards the nearest convenience store to get a decent, drinkable brand of coffee and went back the same way he came from. He planned to go home, drink the coffee he bought and make his new art piece.

But it seemed that God had other plans for him, as he came across a small art store in the corner of a street, the name being 'Re'. He decided to pay it a visit since he was running out of art utensils and didn't have any inspiration to paint anyways, which had been a thing for weeks.

His name is Kaneki Ken, a renowned artist who draws and paints anything and everything, as long as he has inspiration. He's mostly known for his scenery paintings and portraits of people. People queue to go his art exhibitions and fight to buy his art pieces because that's just how valuable his art is to them. But he is not the friendly and approachable man everyone sees him to be on media. In reality, he is short-tempered, easily irritated, mean and impatient. He wasn't like this until 5 years ago, when Asuka cheated on him and his personality did a 360 degrees change. He is no longer the gentle, caring and gullible boy he was.

—

The bell chimed as he entered the store and a female worker who was restocking the supplies smiled at him. "Welcome."

He couldn't take his eyes off of her the moment he saw her. It was as if inspiration immediately struck him, even though he's been stuck for weeks. Taking a walk around the shop, he pretended to look at the brushes but had his eyes glancing over to her once every few seconds as she walked around with a basket of art supplies hanging from her arm and a notepad in her hand. She had short fluffy violet hair, a pair of ocean-blue eyes, a small button nose and pink lips. His eyes travel down the pale skin of her slim neck, to her hourglass figure. She was inspiration itself. That was when he decided that he'd make her his model for his new art.

Kaneki grabbed a few brushes, some paint, pencils, color pencils and walked up to her saying that he wants to buy them. It wasn't only because he wanted to see her up close, but also because she was the only one in the shop and there was no one behind the counter. When she stared down at the utensils in his basket, her eyes moved up to meet his and his breath hitched in his throat. Those were the most beautiful eyes he's ever seen. Long eyelashes, double eyelids, and glimmering dark blue eyes. He knew he just had to get her as his model somehow.

"Alright. Please follow me." She said, walking towards the counter and he followed behind to place the basket onto the counter. He watched as her dainty hands scanned every item and quickly thought about how he's going to ask her.

"The total will be 5000 yen."

He fished for the notes in his wallet and placed it on the money tray. Staring down at her name tag, he thought that even her name was beautiful. "Kirishima-San?"

"Yes?"

"I am an artist and I'm currently looking for inspiration for my next art piece. Will you be my model?"

"But I don't have any experience in modeling..."

"You just have to sit on a chair and do the poses I tell you to. It's very easy and I'll pay you. I'll let you think about it and come back again for your response." He passed her his name card and took the plastic bags of items. "I hope to hear a favorable answer."

After he left the shop, Touka put a finger to her chin and pondered. Where have I seen him before? She quickly whipped out her phone and typed in the name displayed on his name card into google. Her eyes widened at the search results of him being a famous artist. She couldn't recognize him at all, with him dressed up so casually in only a T-shirt and long pants, instead of his usual tuxedo. He was different from his usual cheery self on media. He seemed..cold. Besides, it was weird for a famous artist like him to ask a normal girl like her to be his model. Could it be he's having trouble with inspiration? She shook her head and stared at the contact number located below his name.

—

In the end, Touka decided that having a side job on top of her full-time job is good to give her more money and stood in front of his apartment, the address he gave her after they exchanged some texts. She would be lying if she said she wasn't interested in getting to know him better. Why is he cheerful on television but cold when he's his usual self? Could there be a reason behind that cold demeanor of his?

Pressing on the doorbell, she waited for a few seconds until the door opened to Kaneki Ken, wearing a black long-sleeved buttoned up shirt, tucked into his black long pants. "Thanks for coming. You can enter."

Touka was surprised the moment she stepped into his house. She expected a huge artist like him to stay in a terrace or a bungalow but he was not, and was impressed that he's staying in a small 3 room unit. It was a fairly plain apartment, with every furniture being either black or white. But it was very aesthetically pleasing to the eyes because of the choice in the colors. As expected of an artist.

He led her down the hall and into the last room along the corridor. "This is my studio, where I do my art."

The male opened the door to reveal a room filled with paintings and arts on both sides of the room. In the middle sat a stool behind an easel, a table beside the stool and a chair that is few meters away from the easel.

"Sit on that chair and wait for a bit."

It sounded like an order from the tone he was using and Touka didn't like it. But she did accept this job and settled onto the chair as instructed. She glanced around the room and at every art, admiring the pieces and felt extremely lucky to be able to see them as they haven't been released to the public yet. But she wondered why most of them consisted only of negative colors, like black and white.

She wasn't able to see more as Kaneki placed the supplies he needed onto the small table beside the stool and walked towards her to hold her chin in his hand. Her heart raced as his face came closer to hers until she deflated in embarrassment when she realized that he was just adjusting her head to the angle that he wanted to draw her in. "I'm going to draw a half-body portrait of you today, so you can move your lower body but not the upper. Do you understand?"

Touka couldn't wait to tell her best friend—Yoriko about how snobbish and rude the artist Kaneki Ken is in reality.

"Yes."

He went to sit down onto his stool and she was amused when he put on a pair of round-rimmed spectacles before he started drawing. The sound of the pencil scratching across the canvas soon filled the room and she couldn't stand the awkward silence that came every time he stopped drawing to stare at her.

"So uh...what made you want to become an artist?"

He continued drawing as if he didn't hear her question.

"Kaneki-San?" She thought he was just too absorbed in drawing that he didn't hear her.

"Be quiet and don't move." His voice came out muffled from his head hiding behind the canvas.

...so he heard me and chose to ignore me. Irritating bastard. I should have never taken this job.

An awkward hour went by with him just drawing non-stop and her staring at everywhere in the room, including him. He had jet black hair, bangs covering a part of his eyes, spectacles resting on the bridge of his slim nose and thin lips that seemed to be permanently frowning. He would have been a perfect guy if he didn't have a scowl on his face all the time. She wondered why but kept it to herself since he seems like the type who dislikes people prying into their personal affairs.

"I'm done."

Touka stood up and walked towards him, eager to see how he had drawn her. To her dismay, he covered the drawing with a white cloth before she got a glimpse of it and passed her a stack of yen. "Here's your pay for today. You may go. I'll contact you for the next appointment."

At the moment, she lost her patience. "You're being awfully rude, don't you think so? Firstly, you didn't serve me tea or coffee when I arrived. Secondly, you order me around. Thirdly, after spending 1 hour sitting in an uncomfortable position, you won't even let me see the drawing. What are you trying to do? I was hoping that we could at least get to know one another so the time wouldn't be so boring. The least you could do is answer someone's question when they ask you something!"

His eyes widened as she scolded him and shot him a deadly glare. Out of the many models that came before her, none of them had the gall to treat like him like this. He couldn't help a grin creep on his face but quickly hid it. "This is strictly only a working relationship. We won't become friends and nothing more."

"Fine. I didn't expect to be more than friends anyway with that shitty attitude you have. I'm leaving."

Kaneki Ken went to sleep with a smile on his face for the first time in 5 years.

—

He calls for her to return again the next week and this time, she doesn't make any attempts in making conversation because she simply just wanted to finish the job as soon as possible, get her money and leave the place. She couldn't stand even a minute more with him and he found that amusing because the women that he had approached before all tried to get more money out of him, sleep with him or take advantage of him. Instead of doing all that, she's trying to stay away from him as far away as possible.

On their 3rd meeting, he finally asked her.

"Why are you being like this?"

Her ears perked up at his voice. This was his first time initiating conversation and she was slightly surprised but didn't want to show that she was interested in continuing the conversation. "Like what?"

"I mean, I am a famous artist so why are you not trying to get more money out of me and instead stay away from me?" He clarified.

She snorted as if insulting him and he stopped his drawing to stare into her blue eyes. "I told you before on our first meeting. If you're going to continue with that attitude, I won't bother. Besides, you were the one who said that this was strictly work so there isn't a reason for me to continue trying to talk to you when you feel that way. Besides, you're not my type of guy."

It was now his turn to snort at her. "Right. I assume your type of guy is one who listens to your every command and is not an asshole like me."

"..well you're right about that. I like a guy who's willing to spend time listening to me, is caring, is good at cuddling and not an a-hole like you." 

Kaneki rolled his eyes at that. He's not sure about the cuddling part but he used to have all of those characteristics before Asuka cheated on him by bringing another male to his room, his bed and make out.

Women are liars, they say what the guy wants to hear and then cheat on them behind their backs. He doesn't realize this but he actually said the last sentence out and Touka only stared at him with a sympathetic look on her face. "Did something happen to make you think that way? Did..someone perhaps cheat on you?"

With that question, his nose flared and he kicked his stool to the ground, startling her. "It's none of your business!" He roared.

It seems she touched a nerve. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to remind you of something."

"Leave. Before I lose my temper."

You're already losing it.

"Okay. I'll..see you again. I'm really sorry." Touka really did feel apologetic about prying too much into his issues. It also looked like a very painful one from the way his eyes displayed so much sorrow.

—

Kaneki didn't ask her to return for one week and Touka decided to pay him a visit as she was worried. She knocked on his door and it opened a few seconds later to a messy-haired and bloodshot eyes Kaneki. The words naturally came out of her mouth even though she knew she wasn't supposed to make him feel worse than he already is. "Wow. You look like shit."

"..yeah. I haven't been able to sleep well. Did you come here to poke fun at me or what?"

"No. I came to apologize. I'm really sorry about last week. I shouldn't have asked you so many questions. Will you..forgive me?" She stared at him, eyes pleading.

He pinched his nose bridge and furrowed his brows. "Come in and we'll talk."

—

After pouring cups of coffees for the two of them, Kaneki settled down on the couch opposite her and sipped the coffee. She did the same and placed the cup gently down onto the glass table. "As I was saying, I feel bad about asking of your problems. I'm sorry. But if you want to talk about it, I'm here to listen. "

"..I'm sorry about losing my temper at you and kicking the chair too."

He then went on to talk about how he found his ex-girlfriend in his bed with another guy and how she broke up with him in such a horrible manner.

"I found it very hard to trust people after that. Especially women. I'm sorry about the way I treated you."

"I understand. I'm sorry for getting mad at you too. Heck, we keep apologizing to each other. Can we put that away and say that we forgive one another?" Touka joked, grinning at him.

Kaneki cracked a small smile. "Yeah, we can."

That was the first time she's ever seen his smile directed at her.

—

They started getting along with one another as they continued meeting for his drawings. He wasn't as rude as before and she didn't scold him anymore. They talked more often, chatting about trivial and deep topics. Touka is starting to realize that he's not much of an asshole that she once thought he was. Kaneki is also slowly opening up to her, often talking more about himself, his art and how he gets the motivation to do them. The way he talks so passionately about his art makes Touka think of him as an even more attractive man than he already was.

One day when he was painting a full body portrait, Touka got curious and asked him. "Say, why are you always drawing repeated pieces of me? Isn't one enough? I'm not complaining about the extra money and the company though."

"It's so that I can choose the best out of all the ones I've drawn and painted."

She heard the brush go across the canvas. "Then what are you going to do with the rest?"

Kaneki shrugged. "Probably just display them like the ones you see in the room. Why?"

Another stroke.

"Then can you give me one? I want to keep one."

He stopped and pondered. "Alright then. Just let me finish this painting first."

—

After he's done with his piece, he lined all of the canvases together and pulled the white cloths away to reveal what he has been painting every single time. The sight took her breath away and she couldn't take her eyes off his art because of how beautiful she looked in them. Every canvas is different in terms of the angle and her expression. The one that caught her eye was the one where she was smiling. Her hair was painted with a mix of blue and purple, lips painted a rosy pink with gloss, nose slender and smooth, and the most effort put into the painting were her eyes. The long eyelashes and her eyes that were big, blue and glimmering. It was stunning.

"Is this how you normally see me? Because I don't think I'm as pretty as this painting." Touka asked, feeling the surface of canvas beneath her fingers.

Kaneki held her chin in his hand and tilted it so she looked at him. He flashed a smile and with a gentle voice, he said, "you're much more beautiful than you think you are, Touka."

Her cheeks flushed at that and her mind debated on whether he was saying for the sake of it or meant it. It seemed that he didn't put much thought in that and released his hand. "I'm taking it as you want this painting. Come on, it's getting late. I'll drive you home."

"Eh? You don't have to. I stay quite near here."

He wouldn't take no for an answer and started putting on his coat. "I won't allow a lady to go home alone when it's getting dark. Besides, I'm sure you'll have problems bringing the huge canvas back."

She glanced at the painting and wondered how she would even get home without dropping it. "..alright. Thank you."

Touka would be lying if she said she wasn't impressed by his BMW despite him living in a small 3-room apartment.

—

Kaneki brought the canvas into her living room and left it lying against the wall on the floor. He dusted away the dirt from his coat and turned to leave. "Well then, I'll be going now. See you in a few days."

"Wait! I have some leftover curry. Do you want to stay for dinner? As thanks for the ride." Touka asked.

"No, it's alright. I'm not hungry—"

His stomach rumbled in the middle of his sentence and he clenched his jaw at the embarrassment. She chuckled and went to her kitchen. "Your stomach says otherwise. I take that you're staying then. Take a seat at the dining table. I'll heat up the curry and it'll be done soon."

The male removed his coat, hung it over the dining table's chair and sat down. He glanced around the house and saw how much smaller it was compared to his 3 room apartment. She was staying in a 1 room apartment, where the living room, bedroom & toilet are separated by only dividers.

"You don't stay with your parents?"

"Nope. It's just me."

"No.." He hesitated. "Boyfriend?"

"Don't have one."

"I-I see." He wondered why he felt so relieved at her answer.

The spicy scent of curry soon filled the air and Touka brought it to the table. "It's ready! Let's eat."

After the meal, he was about to stand to leave again until she stopped him by pressing a wine bottle to his chest and staring at him with a grin. "Drink with me for a bit. Do you want white or red wine?"

He sat back down and pulled at his collar. "..red."

"Good choice. I like red too."

Touka placed 2 glasses on the table and proceeded to pour wine into both. They let out a sigh of satisfaction after finishing the wine in one shot and it seemed that she drank too much when her body starts to feel hot. "So..I've been wanting to ask you this for some time but aren't you lonely all these years with no one by your side? Because I'm sure feeling lonely since my last breakup." She hiccuped.

He bit his lip and didn't answer.

"It's okay if you don't reply me, I understand."

She stood up, a little dizzily and he quickly moved to hold her by the shoulders before she toppled over. "I'm okay. I'm good." She mumbled as she swayed over to grab the canvas and walked into her room. She glanced around her tiny room and put her finger to her lips. "Where should I put this??"

"Maybe you should put that up tomorrow. You look drunk." Kaneki suggested.

"I am not drunk, Kaneki. I'm feeling fineee~"

That's what all drunks say, Touka.

"But really..." she stared down at the canvas then stepped closer to him to look up at him. "Do I look this beautiful to you?"

He swallowed. She's really beautiful up close... "Y-you do."

"Hmm..? Then kiss me to prove it."

His mind wandered over to her earlier question.

Aren't you lonely all these years with no one by your side?

He doesn't know if it's the alcohol that's messing with his thinking or actions, but he answered her question by pressing his lips to hers. Yes. I am lonely.

Touka rested the canvas against the wall and moved to wrap her arms around his neck. Hesitantly separating from her, Kaneki watched as she parted her pink lips before standing on her toes to kiss him again. They exchanged many kisses until they were out of breath and knew what they wanted to do when they stared into each other's lust-filled eyes. Tumbling on the bed, they proceeded to make slow and gentle love that night.

—

The next morning, Touka woke up with a splitting headache and realized that she was lying naked in her bed, with her clothes strewn all over the floor. She tried to recall what happened the previous night that made her this way and finally remembered that she did it with Kaneki Ken. Her insides brimmed with happiness and yet she was disappointed that he didn't stay the night.

Did he not like her? Or was it a one-night thing to him? That was when she realized that during the time she had spent with him, she fell in love and she needed to tell him that. She quickly got dressed and took some painkillers to ease the headache before heading out to his house.

—

The doorbell rung and Kaneki ruffled his hair with a groan, fully knowing who it was at the door. He wasn't done thinking about what happened last night, about them and how he should treat her from now on. Hell, he's only ever dated Asuka, how was he supposed to know what to do? Nevertheless, he answered the door to reveal a haggard-looking Touka who only stared at him.

"..You left last night."

She wasn't asking a question but was stating a fact and he nodded. "I was just thinking over things earlier and I don't know how I should approach you from now on—"

Cupping his cheeks, Touka surged forward to press her soft lips to his and when she pulled back, his heart thumped in his ears at the thought of wanting more, more—

"Please tell me you felt something from that. That we have a connection between us. Or am I the only one who thinks that we do?" Touka asked, disappointment evident in her voice.

Kaneki averted his gaze from her and turned his head to the side. "No. You're right. But I-i don't think I'm ready for another relationship. It's too much for me. I'm sorry."

She moved her hands down to wrap around his neck and bit her lip. "Look me in the eye and tell me that, Kaneki. If you can do that, I'll accept that you're saying the truth."

He was determined to say it while looking into her eyes, but when his eyes met hers, he just couldn't do it. Those were the eyes that he fell for the first time he saw them in her shop. His heart hurts when he realized that those beautiful eyes of hers displayed so much sorrow in them because of him.

"I..."

One side of him is urging him to tell her so he won't get hurt anymore. But another side is trying to stop him from doing so, thinking that she would never do things to hurt him. And it seemed that she knew what he was conflicted about and decided to go first. "I love you, Kaneki. I fell in love and it isn't for your looks or your money. It was for you being you. I just want you to know that I won't ever cheat or hurt you like Asuka did. I love you."

Her eyes did not betray her words and he decided to stop running from his past. "Okay. Let's date."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part 2 of asphyxia

Even though Kaneki is already long done with painting Touka and moved on to doing other arts, she continued going over and even stayed the night sometimes. She often accompanied him whenever he went somewhere to get inspiration and he didn't feel as bored and lonely as before. When she's with him, he feels himself slowly but surely reverting to how he used to be 5 years ago, being kind, caring and cheerful again. She changed his whole perspective from negative to positive and that has shown in his works, where the blacks and whites of every art slowly changed into bright colors like orange, yellow and red.

In a short span of 7 months, she became such an important person in his life.

\--

Ever since he released the painting of Touka to the public, there have been many clients contacting his manager to purchase it and they ended up selling it at 20 million to a person named Takatsuki Sen. But the response was so huge that Kaneki got invited to have a 3-day exhibition in Hokkaido, using the sold Touka painting and some of his other works which were also sold at a pretty good price. He was also to be present at the venue for an interview, which he accepted.

The exhibition opens tomorrow, but he would have to take the plane this afternoon at 3pm so he can reach there early and have one night's rest.

\--

Pulling the blankets away, Kaneki reached for his clothes that were all over the floor and put them on before hearing a rustling of the sheets behind him and he turned to see his girlfriend staring at him with a pout on her pink lips. "What time are you leaving for the airport?"

He smiled, moving to brush away the hair from her eyes. "In about 2 hours or so."

"Then why are you putting on your clothes so early? Stay with me a little longer." Touka whined, arms embracing his waist and burying her face into his back.

Squeezing her hands, he grinned because she rarely whines, saying that it isn't a nice thing to do, but he sometimes wishes that she would do it more often because he found it extremely cute that she's being clingy to him. It makes him feel wanted and loved.

"I have to pack my luggage and change, Touka." He replied as he got to his feet and she pulled him back to sit on the bed.

"Kennnnn. Do it later. I want your warmth..."

Kaneki sighed, the smile still evident on his face and he laid back down on the side to take her in his arms. "Alright alright. Anything for my queen."

Touka grinned and inhaled his heady body smell that she loved.

\--

She still had a pout on her lips when she saw him off at the doorstep and he cupped her cheeks to kiss her. "I'll be back as soon as the exhibition ends, I promise. But in return, can you promise me that you'll watch my interview tomorrow morning at 9?"

Nodding, she gave him one last hug and released him. "Okay. I'll be waiting for you to come home."

\--

The next day, Touka turned on the television, switched to the art channel and saw Kaneki on the screen with a bunch of microphones in front of him. He had his hair pushed back and wore a black tuxedo.

"Congratulations on having a full-house on the first day of your exhibition, Kaneki-san! This has been a topic among young girls and we would like to know the inspiration behind your most famous piece this year! Do enlighten us about it!" The reporter positioned the microphone below his mouth and he smiled.

"Thank you very much. I am very humbled that many have come to see my artworks at this exhibition and am very thankful for those who have purchased them. The name of that painting is 'Lover' and it is actually a picture of my current girlfriend. This is something I've never shared with the world before but I once was cheated on. 5 years after that, I met my current girlfriend one day in her shop and she was the one who pulled me out of the despair and misery I was drowning in. She is my only beloved in this world and that inspired me to name it 'Lover'." He then turned to face the camera at the front, as if he was talking directly to her through the screen. "And I love her with all my heart."

At the end of his touching speech, tears slipped down her cheeks and she covered her mouth to stifle her sobs. You idiot. Why the public confession? Despite calling him an idiot and stupid, she still felt incredibly happy.

\--

After the interview is over, Kaneki quickly went to a corner and whipped out his phone to dial Touka. She picked up after a few rings and he smiled. "Hey, did you manage to see the interview?"

He could hear her sobs over the phone and got worried when she didn't reply. "T-Touka?"

"YOU IDIOT!!!"

Everyone in the exhibition hall turned to him and he bowed to them as an apology.

"Jeez, you really drive me crazy sometimes. Why did you do that over the public forecast? It's all your fault that I'm crying now. But, thank you. I love you too, Ken."

He smiled. "I can't wait to see you soon. I miss you already."

"Me too."

—

In those days that he was separated from her, he missed her so dearly and decided that he didn't want to spend the rest of his life away from her.

—

The day which Kaneki is expected to return happened to be his birthday and having known that, Touka prepared a birthday surprise for him.

"Touka, I'm home! Where are you?"

When he heard a sound from his bedroom, his heart started thumping wildly in his chest. What is this feeling of dejavu? Will the same thing happen all over again? The cheating, the lies, the pain. His hand tightened around the doorknob and he swallowed. That's right. Touka would never cheat on me. She promised me.

He turned the doorknob to see his girlfriend holding a cake in her hands and staring at him. Her lips turned into a frown upon meeting his eyes and she sighed. "Ah... you saw... I was planning to surprise you but you're back way too early."

"W-what is this about?" His heart gradually went back to its normal beating rate when he saw that it was just her in the room.

"Don't tell me you forgot that your birthday is today? I heard from your manager and decided to celebrate it with you." She answered, placing the cake gently on the table, careful not to drop it.

Tears brimmed in his eyes and he struggled to prevent more from escaping. He dropped everything that he was holding to the floor and tackled her with a tight hug. "I'm sorry for doubting you. I thought—I thought that you were cheating on me."

Though taken aback by his sudden hug at first, she eased into it and wrapped her arms around him. "I told you, didn't I? That I will never do that to you. But I'm sorry for reminding you of that. I should've placed the cake at the dining table. It's not much of a surprise but do you like it? If you don't, I suppose I can try other—"

She gasped when he captured her lips swiftly between his and pulled back hesitantly to smile at her. "I do. I really do like it. Thank you."

Cupping his cheeks and leaning in to steal a kiss, she returned the smile as his hands squeezed her waist. "Welcome home, Ken."

—

It's been a few weeks since the exhibition and things are slowly settling down again. Now that Touka's identity is exposed, she starts getting more customers at her shop, fortunately, and unfortunately for her. She's happy that there's more business, but she's also upset about being so tired that she ends up sleeping soon after meeting Kaneki at his house. Although he said he didn't mind, she still didn't feel happy about not being able to spend time with him like before.

It's been 9 months since he started dating Touka and though he is happy with her, there is just one part of him that's still suffocating. It's as if he is trapped and suffering. He supposes that to get rid of this feeling, he has to let go of Asuka and that cheating incident. But till this day, he is still furious and hurt about what happened and he can't find it in himself to forgive her.

—

Touka decided to cook dinner for the two of them one day and is running late from buying the groceries. Kaneki decided to wait for her in the living room and turned on the television to watch. Not long after, the doorbell rang and he quickly went to answer it, only to be disappointed that it was Asuka standing there, not Touka. "Hey. It's been a while."

He narrowed his eyes and moved to close the door but she pushed on it. "P-please just hear what I have to say! It'll only take 10 minutes!"

"I have nothing to say to you. Not after how you treated me like trash. Go home, Asuka. I don't want to see you or hear your voice ever again." He said coldly, putting more strength in closing the door but she remained persistent and continue pushing against it.

"I want to apologize!"

He stopped, hesitated and opened the door to let her in. His eyes fixed cold and hard at her and he tapped his foot. "Go on. Let's hear what you have to say."

She shivered. What happened to him? He wasn't like this when we were dating. He's scary...

"About 5 years ago, I am very sorry. Ever since then, I've reflected on it and realized that it was horrible of me to do that. And I was too scared to see you again to say this until now. After seeing you on television talking about your girlfriend, I managed to gather the courage to come here. I hope you'll forgive me and...please believe me when I say that I still love you. I—I want to get back together with you, Ken."

"First things first, I do not forgive you. Secondly, I have no intention of getting back with a cheater because they never change. Now get out of my house. I won't see you to the door."

Asuka grabbed his arm and pleaded with him. "Please have mercy on me! My mother is dying and my father owes so many debts! I—I need your help!"

"So the real reason you came here is just to borrow money from me? Fat chance. I'll never lend you money. Now get out!" Kaneki shouted and when she refused to budge, he grabbed her and started pulling her to the door.

"Please don't do this to me! I still love you, I—"

"Ken? What's wrong?"

The two stared at Touka who was standing at the door holding a bunch of plastic bags in her hands. "Hey darling, you're back. Don't worry, Asuka is just leaving." Kaneki flashed a forced smile but in his heart, he was seething in anger. How dare she come back, pretending to be sorry and pitiful just to get money from him? Even if he dies, he'll never do it.

Touka's eyes narrowed as she stared at the lady in front of her up and down. "So you're Asuka, that bitch huh?"

Asuka yanked her hand away from his grip and placed them on her hips. "Who are you calling a bitch, you little money slut?! Don't think I don't know you're dating him because of his money. You don't really love him, you just want his money! That's all he has going for him anyway—" Asuka ranted, but her eyes went wide when Touka slapped her face.

"How dare you say that he only has that going for him? I'll have you know he's extremely caring, kind, handsome and great in bed! Oh, I guess you wouldn't know that because you were too busy screwing other guys! So fuck off and get out of this house, you bitch!" Touka spat, pushed Asuka out of the house and slammed the door.

She took deep breaths to regain the air she used to shout at that woman and then turned to Kaneki who had his face drained of every energy he had and she placed the groceries down to go to hug him. "Ken, it's over. It's all over. It's okay now. I'm here."

Kaneki's arms encircled her and he buried his face in her shoulder to cry. The breath that he has been holding in for a long time is finally released and he doesn't feel suffocated anymore. His suffocation finally ended and for once, he can properly breathe again.

—

Touka laid her head against Kaneki's chest and listened to the da-dum da-dum of his heart.

"..You were very cool earlier on. When you told Asuka off and forced her to leave. I'm really happy you stood up for me and yourself. Thank you." He commented, running his fingers through her hair and she pulled back to look at his smiling face.

"Is that so? I thought that was normal. I was angry at what she did to you and how she even said that the only good thing about you is money. She doesn't know the real you. The caring, the kind, the humble you. I'm also really insulted that she said you were ugly because you are definitely very handsome. But that isn't why I fell for you, you know that right? And you're welcome." She grinned.

"Of course I do. I didn't fall for your looks either. But I admit that I was stunned when I first saw you. You still look beautiful." He pressed a kiss to her forehead and she giggled, hitting his chest gently.

"So cheesy. Hey, Ken?"

"Hm?"

"I wasn't lying about you being great in bed. It's the truth."

Kaneki can't help a blush from forming on his cheeks and he pulled her close by the waist to nuzzle his nose against hers. I love her. I love her so much.

"I love you."

His eyes widened when he heard it not from his mouth, but from Touka's and he stared down at her as she flashed him a smile and repeated it. "I love you, Ken."

Hearing someone actually say that directly to him and mean it from the bottom of their heart just makes him so touched and he can't help but let tears flow down his cheeks. "I love you too, Touka."

He gave her a tight hug before releasing her and leaving bed to get something from his drawer. The female frowned at the loss of his warmth and watched as he fished for something in there. "What's so important that you have to get out of bed to find for? Come back to bed, Kennnn."

He smirked. She's completely used to whining now. He supposes it's his influence.

"Wait, it's very important. Give me one minute. I swear I put it somewhere."

Touka continued watching him from the back and pouted. "Hurry up!"

This is weird. Where did I put the box? Where? It was still with me when I bought it in Hokkaido... ah found it!

"Coming!" He grabbed the box, went back and made her sit up in bed. Clearing his throat, he threw away all of the insecurities he had about this and went for it. "Kirishima Touka."

"Why are you looking so serious? What's wrong?"

"I have been thinking about us. You have changed me in ways that I could never have imagined you would and I am very happy to have you by my side. I want to share my happiness and sadness together with you now and forever. I want to continue living with you, have children with you and grow old with you. I promise that I will make you happy only if you give me a chance to. Will you marry me?" He opened the velvet red box to reveal a huge diamond ring inside and she gasped at the shining ring.

"Ken I—I don't know what to say..."

"Say yes?" He suggested with a sheepish smile.

"Of course. A million times yes. Why would you ever think I'd say no?" She joked, but she had tears streaming down her cheeks and he took the ring out of the box to slide it through her finger but she pulled her hand back, preventing him from doing so. He looked at her with a frown. She knows that look, he's asking why.

"Yes I will marry you but I can't accept that ring. It was expensive, wasn't it? I told you I didn't need any expensive stuff, just simple ones would do. I don't want you spending unnecessary extra money for me. Get that ring changed to a cheaper one."

Kaneki pouted. "Ehh... but this is an engagement ring! It's meant to be expensive and nice! It's only 30k, Touka!"

"Only 30k? That's hella expensive! I don't know if you're crazy or what but 30k for a commoner is extremely expensive. Change it to a 5k one at least. If not, I won't marry you." She demanded and folded her arms.

The male sighed and wrapped his arms around her. "I really can't win against you. Promise me you'll say yes if I do change it."

"Jeez yes I promise!"

He put the box away and moved to get on top of her with a smirk. Pulling the blankets above them, he proceeded to lock his lips with hers and pressed kisses down the sensitive parts of her neck that made her squirm and squeal. She scratched the delicate skin of his waist and he groaned into her shoulder.

—

He ended up changing the ring into a 10k one but lied that it was a 5k one. Not that she could tell the difference anyway.

—

They got married 6 months later, remained a couple for 4 years before deciding to have 3 children. They lived till the ripe age of 78 and still was inseparable at that age.

Even after they left the world, memories of them will never disappear as the last painting Kaneki did of the two of them is displayed on the balcony of their bedroom. And it was a painting of them laughing while gazing into each other's eyes.

—

My love for you is a journey; starting at forever, ending at never.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know your thoughts and do leave kudos if you liked it! :)

**Author's Note:**

> do leave kudos/comments if you liked it :)


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